Being a high-maintenance person or having a high-maintenance lifestyle often gets a bad name. Ironically, the same people who consider ‘high maintenance’ a negative label would also consider someone who is ‘low maintenance’ inferior. In reality, just taking care of yourself, whether that is considered low or high maintenance, should be the objective. 

Let’s go through what it really means to be high maintenance and why you should aim to be just that. 

Personal Presentation

As social creatures, we depend heavily on the people around us for our physical, emotional, spiritual, and overall well-being. Whether we like it or not, how we present ourselves physically plays a huge role in how others perceive us and how they consequently behave with us. The best-case scenario is that we can portray an image of ourselves that others see positively. Moreover, we also want to portray behavior that others appreciate, find helpful, and enjoy. 

However, a good outward appearance starts from the inside. If we aren’t feeling happy, positive, or driven, it is unlikely that this will be reflected in our outward behavior and our outward appearance. Some people are able to create a facade to mask their true feelings, but for the vast majority, it is much easier to feel good on the inside and let that radiate to the external, visible self. 

What about YOU?

This means you need to work on various aspects of yourself to improve your outward appearance. The best strategy is to work on both your internal and external aspects. That way, you’ll be basically improving inside out. After all, this is about giving yourself a better life and the kind of life you want for yourself while also being a positive member of society and playing your part in improving the lives of others around you. A person can be broken down into a few main components, which are areas you should be working on. 

Esteem and Confidence 

Two of the most important aspects of the self are self-esteem and self-confidence. These can generally be described as what you think about yourself and how you feel about your skills/abilities/traits/features. We also develop a lot of our self-esteem and self-confidence based on our body image. 

If you have passed a driving test, you are confident that you can safely drive on public roads because you have been tested and you have learned, through the test and the certification that you received, that you have the skills to drive. On the contrary, if you have only read a book about driving, you wouldn’t be as confident because you haven’t gotten external validation, nor have you gotten any real evidence that you have what it takes to be a safe driver. 

Appearance 

Unfortunately, people will judge based on looks. It’s how it’s always been and likely how it will be for many years. We are visual animals, and how we see things plays a big role in how we perceive and internalize that thing. 

If you look in the mirror and love your hairstyle, you will have a far more positive self-image than if you thought that your hair looks quite bad and you shouldn’t be seen in public like this. 

Communication 

Just like how we perceive things according to how we physically see them, how we hear and how we communicate with other humans also plays a role in how we perceive them and the kind of image we develop about them. Communication can be broken down into verbal and nonverbal communication. 

If you want to develop a positive self-image of yourself in front of others, you need to be a strong verbal communicator. Again, the way you communicate and the confidence you communicate with will depend on the self-image and self-esteem that you have. Stuttering, for example, is a good indicator of low self-esteem and self-confidence. 

Nonverbal communication is even trickier because it is very difficult to have control over this. It is possible but quite challenging. It is very easy for our body language to be slouched or generally not be at the level we want when we don’t feel very confident. Good self-esteem and high self-confidence can help develop solid nonverbal communication. 

Behavior

Our overall behavior, whether that is in our professional life or personal life, is also impacted by our level of self-esteem and self-confidence. Things like being punctual, sticking to a good habit, self-development, and many other behavioral traits are all linked to our sense of self. 

Confident behavior shows others that you value them and lets them know that you value yourself. After all, if you aren’t going to stand up for yourself, then who will? A strong and positive sense of self will also get you moving in a direction that will lead you to success and happiness by doing things that are directly beneficial for you. Consequently, you will also be playing a positive role in society and playing your part to help others out.

Self-Care

Self-care is both internal and external. You need to take care of your mind, body, and soul. However, external care is what most people can see, and that is what gets you labeled as a high-maintenance person. This is not a bad label. If more people were high maintenance, we would have a much happier and more productive society. For a woman, there are quite a few avenues for self-care. These include the following.

Hair 

Hair is something that all women (and men) want to take care of. It’s one of the most prominent facial features and can be styled in many ways. Moreover, a change in hairstyle can completely change someone’s appearance. For a lot of women, taking care of their hair has to do with their profession. 

They are required to have a certain kind of haircut, or they are required to take care of their hair to maintain their professional image. Whether you are trying to hide those pesky strands of grey hair, or you just want to do something new, hair care should be a part of your regular maintenance. If you haven’t done something special with your hair, then try it. It can work wonders for your self-esteem and confidence. 

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Nails 

Another favourite for most women is nails. Whether that means getting a manicure and pedicure or just using a new color of nail polish, nail care is fun to do. Moreover, nail care routines and styles are growing with every passing day. Even if you don’t have the best natural nails, you can always get new ones. Fake nails are indistinguishable from real ones these days. 

Nails, just like hair, are always quite prominent, so it helps to have them well-maintained. If done regularly, routine nail care doesn’t take very long either, so it’s something you definitely want to do regularly, like brushing your teeth. 

Makeup and Skincare 

Makeup and skincare are a staple for most women, whether they are working or stay-at-home ladies. These two things go hand in hand because without good skin, makeup can’t really shine. However, you can wear makeup to cover up some poor skin. With makeup, there are also a lot of options, and it can be tweaked in any way you want to better meet your needs. Makeup can also change your appearance, so it would be worth experimenting and seeing what makes you feel better. At the end of the day, you want to look good, so you can feel good. 

Shopping 

Shopping beyond your means, shopping for unnecessary things, or being a compulsive buyer certainly isn’t something anyone should do under any circumstance, especially not for self-care. However, when you do need to buy something, there is no harm in having a look at your options and taking your time to decide. 

People who are very specific about what they want, or ladies that take a while to find something that they like, are often called high maintenance when in reality they just want to find something that they really like. No one wants to wear something generic, so you shouldn’t beat yourself about being selective about what you buy. Of course, your shopping excursion shouldn’t cost you the entire day or keep someone else from doing what they need to. If you are shopping sensibly, there is nothing wrong with it. Moreover, going out to the mall or browsing online is an activity that many people enjoy. Maintaining a healthy balance in anything you do is always good. 

Jewellery 

It never hurts to take the time to pick some jewellery that you can wear with your nice clothes and shoes. Jewellery can be a little tricky. There are a lot of options at a lot of different options at different price points, and particular kinds of jewellery are better suited to events. Building up your jewellery inventory can take time and cost quite a bit of money, but as long as you are being reasonable about it, there is nothing to worry about. 

Not all women, however, like jewellery. If you haven’t gotten some nice jewellery, consider getting the basics, like a necklace and a ring. If you feel like it is something you want to get into, you can start learning about different metals, stones, and styles and start building your collection from there. 

Affection

One of the most important internal maintenance components is affection. The feeling of being loved, having friends, and having a social life is something that all humans need. 

There is nothing wrong with wanting these things, but you also must understand that different people express this in different ways, and just because someone expresses their feelings for you less intensely than you would like them to doesn’t mean they don’t exist. The best solution is to talk about things and discuss how you feel and try to get to the bottom of why you feel that way. 

Women feel affection, or classify affectionate behavior, differently than men. In a romantic relationship, both individuals should feel like they are loved and wanted. The best way to achieve this is to talk about it and do what the other person wants. 

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Conclusion 

Whether society classifies your preferences and life choices as high maintenance doesn’t really matter. When you are spending your own time, money, health, and everything else, you don’t have to worry about what other people think. However, you must be mindful of other people and ensure you aren’t hurting someone or being insensitive in pursuing the things you want. Life is meant to be enjoyed, and any day could be the last. Take care of yourself and the people around you and do what makes you happy. If it is considered high maintenance, then so be it. If it improves your self-esteem and makes your life a little better and happier, it is all worth it in the end. 

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References:

The Real Meaning of High Maintenance...it’s is called the FEEL-GOOD FACTOR!!! (n.d.). Vforhair.Co.Nz. https://www.vforhair.co.nz/blog/the-real-meaning-of-high-maintenance-its-is-called-the-feel-good-factor

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